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This blog is dedicated to the mockery and scorn of overzealous acronym usage everywhere. The underlying premise is that acronyms are a poisonous stream in the river of language evolution. My own experience with the slow brain death syndrome that results from acronyms has been with the Ontario education system. TLCP, EQAO, DI, NaFlC?, and the more universal S.M.A.R.T. Goal. Each of these has contributed in some way to the decrease of neuron connections in my brain and the steady shrinking of my soul. In future posts, I will explore these acronyms and outline the process by which they are inhibiting my “joie de vivre” JDV!

For now, I will tell you where it all began to go wrong for me. I used to like acronyms. When I was a kid, I was all about RBIs and ERA and NHL and NFL. These were like magical symbols to me, hinting at far deeper meanings than their simple letters. Where it all went wrong was when Kentucky Fried Chicken became KFC. I like Kentucky Fried Chicken. I liked the rotating bucket at the top of the pole with that cracker-assed Nazi sympathizer face of colonel Sanders smiling out at me. 11 herbs and spices? Who cares? I liked the grease and the salt and nuclear waste green colored slaw. You knew what you were getting. Chicken. Fried. From Kentucky. Okay, so maybe only the word “fried” was an accurate descriptor, but at least you were under the illusion that you knew what you were getting. Now. KFC. What do you imagine you’re going to get there? A series of random consonants? Sure you can say it faster, but where’s the poetry?

And so begins our journey, into the destruction of language as a result of a global syndrome of attention deficit disorder (ADD which really means SUBTRACT). In the beginning was the Word, and that Word was reduced to a single Letter. Let’s get back to the Word. Reconnect your neurons, expand your soul.

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2 Comments

  1. I agree. When it became KFC, I stopped eating it…wondered now what the “C” meant! 🙂

    I did go to a University where EVERYTHING was an acronym – PEC, JDUC, AMS, ASUS, etc… and I did manage to navigate those… maybe because I was drinking more then? Perhaps the understanding of acronyms is directly related to one’s consumption of alcohol while living in a milieu where acronyms are utilized?


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